Author: Chelsea Campbell

Winter is coming

But it feels like it’s already here. I love winter! As a knitter, I love how all the gloves and hats and scarves I make are suddenly useful. I love how as soon as it starts to get chilly out, it feels like Christmas. Hot drinks taste better and are more fun, especially after coming in from a walk in the cold, and making dessert suddenly becomes “festive.” And when it snows, everything is magical.

I LOVE it.

But then, by the end of winter, I HATE it. I hate having to put on extra clothes before leaving the house, and taking them back off again when I come in. I hate how it hurts my nose to go outside. I hate how my pantlegs always get soggy in the cold rain/slush/snow. Winter is always fun going into it, but a pain in the ass on the way out. And last year, winter lasted FOREVER. It was cold and bitter and it snowed harder than it ever snows here, and the snow stayed, and there were giant mounds of dirty nasty slush piled up in the parking lots, and those really stayed. Last year our winter lasted so long, it was still winter when it should have been spring. It was almost still winter when it was supposed to be almost summer, but then it finally left.

It’s colder now than it should be this time of year. If October feels like December, what will December feel like? Right now, I’m happy that the seasons are changing, that something new is happening, and I can easily blow off the thought that we might have seven months of this, and that this happy chill in the air and freezingness at night is just the beginning.

Fanboy and Goth Girl

So, I’m reading The Astonishing Adventures of Fanboy and Goth Girl by Barry Lyga. It’s one of those books I’ve always kinda sorta meant to read, but never got around to. I think, secretly, because I thought I would like it, in that painful way you sometimes get when you’re unpublished. That “OMG, this is so good that it hurts, but it hurts more because I really wish I could do something like this and maybe I can but AGH!” I think that’s the real reason I never read it until now. BECAUSE NOW MY BOOK IS BEING COMPARED TO IT. The back of my ARC (no, I don’t have them yet, but I got to see the finished ARC cover) says, “A sarcastically funny adventure for fans of King Dork and The Astonishing Adventures of Fanboy and Goth Girl.” I think I’m allowed to tell you that. But anyway, I’m not done reading the book yet, but so far that comparison, like, makes my year. I’m reading this book and the voice does remind me of mine and Fanboy and I could be long lost twins. Except I’m a girl, so, you know. It’s one of those books where you’re reading it and going, “OMG, somebody thought that about those stupid bumperstickers too–thank God I’m not alone!”

I love this book. It’s first person, told through Fanboy’s POV. I’m usually leary about male authors writing male protagonists (I LOVE male protagonists in general), because I usually don’t make it very far into it before I want to gouge the MCs eyes out and light them on fire. (Not so when women write them. They know how to not cross The Line.) Of course, when male writers write good female characters, their male characters are usually lovable too, at least from my female POV. Goth Girl is a really well written female character. I TOTALLY relate to, like, everything she says, even if I don’t think I could stand being friends with her. (She’s way too intense for me.) And even the other girl in the book, the one that I’m like, “Nooooo, you can’t end up with her! Stop liking herrrrr!” is still really well done. I *like* her, even if I’m rooting for Goth Girl. When you get down to it, all the characters are well done and not just believable, but likable. But I really like Fanboy. He makes a good MC and his voice is hilarious, and even when talking about the girls he likes and/or lusting after them, he never does anything that disturbs me as a female reader.

I’m pretty close to being done with the book, and I’ve got Goth Girl Rising all geared up and ready to go when I finish.

Today’s adventure: at the used book store

I try to go on at least one adventure every day, for the exercise. Today I was going to take a day off from adventuring, but the truth is, adventuring is kind of addictive. Plus today I woke up feeling like I HAD to go to one of the used bookstores downtown, so I went. I wasn’t sure what I was looking for or if I even wanted to buy anything until I found this:

From Drop Box

When I realized what this was, I almost cried. (Okay, not really because I am of course made of steel, but I wanted to almost cry. But you know that feeling, though. The one where everything falls away from you and you’re smacked with some deep, forgotten about emotion.) This isn’t just a teach yourself Gaelic book–I already have two of those lying around somewhere. This is THE book I was obsessed with during the fall of 10th grade. That was 12 years ago, and I was 15, and I had had barely a year of French, but I’d always wanted to learn Gaelic. I checked this book out from the Covington library. It was blue back then, but I swear this is the same book. I got to keep it for a month, and I studied hard every day. I even made up vocab tests for myself. (This was a precursor to when I would have a similar obsession with Latin seven years later.) I still remember some of it. Not a lot, but a couple phrases got ingrained in my brain, like “Tha mi sgith” I’m tired, “Tha an cat aig an dorus” The cat is at the door, and my personal favorite “Tha mi an spain” I am a spoon. I made it to plurals (SO HARD in Gaelic) before I had to take it back to the library. I think there was a hold on it, so I couldn’t recheck it, and by the time I got it back again, the fire of my obsession had gone out.

I WANTED that book, but it’s not like it was readily available–it might not have still been in print–and this was back in the days when I didn’t even have a bank account and we just barely had the internet. There was this kid in one of my French classes who had done a similar thing and taught himself French with a library book, and he had accidentally dropped the book in a puddle and had to buy it from them, so he got to keep it, even though it was a bit damaged. I was envious. I considered stealing the book so I could buy it from the library, or staging some kind of “accident.” I really wanted something awful to happen to that book so I could keep it. But, no. I couldn’t make myself do either of those things–even though I would have paid the library for it–and so I let it go. I found other self-teaching Gaelic books, but never that one. And now today I walked into a random store and got it for $5. Like, there was an obscure piece of my childhood that had at one point meant the world to me, but I could never have it, and then this morning I woke up with the urge to go to that store for no reason, and there it was.

Guest Blog #6 – Linday Eland

Today’s guest blogger is fellow Egmont author, Lindsay Eland!  Lindsay’s MG novel, Scones and Sensibility, is about a girl who wishes life was more like a Jane Austen novel and decides to remedy that by playing matchmaker while working her summer job in her parents’ bakery.  I can’t wait for December, when this book comes out–it’s on my list of “Christmas presents I’m allowed to buy for myself.”

1. If a pirate, a ninja, and Batman got in a fight, who do you think would win and why?

The ninja would because he’s stealthy and could pants both of them before they knew what had happened…then again, Batman has a complicated suit. Still…the ninja has so much stealth he could pull it off!

2. Who’s your favorite pirate/ninja (in history or fiction)?

Long John Silver was deceptive and cruel…but he did have goodness in him that I couldn’t help but love

3. Along that line, who’s your favorite movie Batman?

I really like Christian Bale, though his voice really get’s on my nerves.

4. What would be the best thing about being a pirate/ninja/Batman?

I’d have super stealth…can you tell I like stealth?

5. Do you think there will ever be peace between pirates and ninjas? How do you think a truce would ever come about? Do you think Batman could negotiate the truce?

Never, though Batman would like to think he could negotiate a truce. But he can’t see very well out of that mask and besides, he can hardly move his neck…obvious truce-making skeelz…yes, I just said, skeelz

6. How would you end said truce and get the feud rolling again and how would you deal with Batman if he tried to interfere?

I would pants a pirate and blame it on Batman.

7. If you tripped and fell into a radioactive vat of cutlasses and gold dubloons and emerged as a pirate-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

Pantsing with stealth

8. If you stumbled a little farther to the left and fell into a radioactive vat of throwing stars and nunchucks and emerged as a ninja-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

Stealthy pantsing

9. If you were a pirate/ninja/Batman and found yourself in love with the enemy (i.e. a ninja/pirate or, say, Catwoman), how would you handle your taboo relationship?

Watch You Got Mail, cause it’s clearly a lot the same as Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan’s relationship

10. And finally, in the event of the Zombie-pocalypse, how would pirates/ninjas/Batman each survive?

The pirates and Batman probably wouldn’t survive…but the ninjas would survive by stealthy pantsing them. No one can mess with that.

T-shirt!!!!

If you know me even a little bit, you probably know I’m a huge sucker for swag and paraphernalia of all kinds.  I will buy souvenirs “to be touristy” even when I don’t care about the tourist attraction.  So naturally, as soon as I got my book cover, I needed a souvenir, and what better souvenir than a t-shirt? With MY AWESOME BOOK COVER on it?

The colors didn’t come out quite perfect–that’s what I get for ordering from Zazzle. This is the second shirt I’ve bought from them, and both have had off colors. In fact, the last shirt I’d ordered was supposed to be in black and white, yet it had an orangey smear across it. The orangey smear ended up looking really good on it, though, so I didn’t complain. But on this one you can see that some of the really bright spots turned out green like the shirt:

From Drop Box

Even with a few flaws, though, it’s still really cool. I’m still thrilled to be wearing it right now. Here’s the back, which turned out perfect:

From Drop Box

Has anyone else had problems with Zazzle?

I would love to have t-shirt giveaways and make Renegade X shirts using my own art. There’s a shirt Damien wears at the end of the book that I want to make, plus scenes from the book trailer would be pretty awesome. Who wouldn’t want a shirt of the toilet scene?

Anyway, I happen to need to go to the library today, and I just HAPPEN to be wearing my awesome shirt with my awesome book cover on it. I am hoping a librarian looks at it and goes, “Ooh, what’s THAT?” And then I’ll be all cool like, buff my nails for a sec, then turn and say, “Oh, this? This is just MY BOOK.” Actually, if that situation does come up, I will probably panic and go, “Oh, um, you mean me? Well, this is, um… you see, I got my book cover–my book cover, ’cause I’m an author–and it was so cool… everybody says it’s cool. I mean, I KNOW it’s cool, because it is, and… I’m not self-published, either. Well, you could probably tell that because my cover is so cool, but my publisher is Egmont USA. You have some of their books, but maybe you don’t recognize the name, but they’re REALLY BIG in Europe. Oh, you have heard of them? Well, uh… I’m one of their authors, and this is my book, and it comes out in May, and no, I don’t have any bookmarks or business cards yet… I was focused on this t-shirt… ha… I have a book trailer.” Yeah.

Guest Blog # 5 – Dee Garretson

Today’s guest blogger is fellow Tenner Dee Garretson!  Dee’s MG novel, Escape from Camp David, tells the story of the president’s son and two friends getting stuck in Camp David during a disaster.  With their bodyguards and secret service men suddenly out of the picture, the kids have to survive on their own and outwit the security systems meant to keep them inside.  It sounds thrilling!  You can read more about Dee and Escape from Camp David at her website.

And don’t forget to enter the CONTEST, which ends a week from today.

1. If a pirate, a ninja, and Batman got in a fight, who do you think would win and why?

Batman, because nobody else has a batmobile, and he’s the only one who gets words superimposed over the fights. BAM! POW!

2. Who’s your favorite pirate/ninja (in history or fiction)?

Captain Blood, because he was dashing, could quote Horace, and was well-dressed. I don’t go for the rotten teeth kind of pirate. I’ve heard there is a movie remake in the works, but it will be space pirates this time.

3. Along that line, who’s your favorite movie Batman?

Christian Bale, but I also have great memories of the television series. I remember my friends and I brought bath towels to school so we could run around at recess and play Batman. For some reason I was always one of the Robins though.

4. What would be the best thing about being a pirate/ninja/Batman?

I would love to have a secret entrance to my house, and a bat phone.

5. Do you think there will ever be peace between pirates and ninjas? How do you think a truce would ever come about? Do you think Batman could negotiate the truce?

I’m not sure Batman could negotiate a truce, but I bet Alfred Pennyworth could.

6. How would you end said truce and get the feud rolling again and how would you deal with Batman if he tried to interfere?

I can’t answer this. I’m on Batman’s side.

7. If you tripped and fell into a radioactive vat of cutlasses and gold dubloons and emerged as a pirate-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

The ability to call up giant waves to get rid of pesky navy ships.

8. If you stumbled a little farther to the left and fell into a radioactive vat of throwing stars and nunchucks and emerged as a ninja-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

The ability to cling to ceilings and walls to improve stealth capabilities.

9. If you were a pirate/ninja/Batman and found yourself in love with the enemy (i.e. a ninja/pirate or, say, Catwoman), how would you handle your taboo relationship?

I’d convince them to become a pirate/ninja/Batperson too.

10. And finally, in the event of the Zombie-pocalypse, how would pirates/ninjas/Batman each survive?

I don’t believe a Zombie-pocalyspse would ever happen, because Zombies are too stupid to take over.

Guest Blog #4 – Anastasia Hopcus

For today’s guest blog feature, I have fellow Egmont author, Anastasia Hopcus!  Anastasia is the author of Shadow Hills,  a creepy YA novel about a teenage girl who travels to a strange town in the hopes of unraveling the secrets of her sister’s mysterious death.  The full description kinda makes me think of Silent Hill, and I can’t wait to read it!  To find out more about Anastasia, visit her website.

Now, onto the interview:

1. If a pirate, a ninja, and Batman got in a fight, who do you think would win and why?

Batman, because there is no one cooler. He beat Superman. And recovered from a broken back. Now that’s determination.

2. Who’s your favorite pirate/ninja (in history or fiction)?

Does Hiro from Mini Ninjas count? Videogames are fiction, right? Because he is ridiculously cute.

3.  Along that line, who’s your favorite movie Batman?

Michael Keaton. Because he was the smirk-iest and I’m big on smirky.

4. What would be the best thing about being a pirate/ninja/Batman?

Batman: Alfred. Ninja: those crazy two-toe shoe things. Pirate: unlimited parrots. Definitely.

5. Do you think there will ever be peace between pirates and ninjas?  How do you think a truce would ever come about?  Do you think Batman could negotiate the truce?

I think Batman could get Lucius Fox to invent a deadly throwing parrot.  Then they could all band together and fight someone they hate even more than each other. Like Jar Jar Binks.

6. How would you end said truce and get the feud rolling again and how would you deal with Batman if he tried to interfere?

Tell the pirates that the ninjas are hiding gold doubloons in their little two-toed shoes. If Batman tried to interfere I’d distract him with a gift card to Radio Shack. Holy gadgets, Batman!

7. If you tripped and fell into a radioactive vat of cutlasses and gold doubloons and emerged as a pirate-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

I could bring about parrot-geddon; a rain of parrots. Like in the movie The Birds, except they’d be green and they’d say “Polly want an evil hell-cracker?”

8. If you stumbled a little farther to the left and fell into a radioactive vat of throwing stars and nunchucks and emerged as a ninja-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

I could spit nunchucks at such a speed that it would knock anyone unconscious for days at a time.

9. If you were a pirate/ninja/Batman and found yourself in love with the enemy (i.e. a ninja/pirate or, say, Catwoman), how would you handle your taboo relationship?

Cloud of invisibility.

10. And finally, in the event of the Zombie-pocalypse, how would pirates/ninjas/Batman each survive?

The pirates would turn all their ships into floating fortresses to stay safe out on the seas. The ninjas would kill the zombies from the shadows. Batman would kick every zombie’s butt with no help at all. Because he’s Batman. In case you forgot, he beat Superman.

  1. If a pirate, a ninja, and Batman got in a fight, who do you think would win and why?

Batman, because there is no one cooler. He beat Superman. And recovered from a broken back. Now that’s determination.

Guest Blog #3 – Sarah from Sarah’s Random Musings

Today’s guest blogger on the subject of pirates, ninjas, and Batman is book blogger and fellow Washingtonian Sarah, from Sarah’s Random Musings!

1. If a pirate, a ninja, and Batman got in a fight, who do you think would win and why?

Batman. I mean he has enough money to hire someone to beat up the Ninjas and the pirates should be no problem.

2. Who’s your favorite pirate/ninja (in history or fiction)?

I don’t know many Ninjas, but Anne Bonny was pretty awesome. Her father was pretty wealthy, but she decided to marry James Bonny. He was a sailor and small time pirate. They moved to the Nassau, where she met John “Calico Jack” Rackham. She had an affair with him and was flogged for it. Later on she ran away with Calico Jack and became a pirate. She met Mary Read, who was another female pirate. She never commanded a ship of her own, but she was really awesome pirate. When she was captured, Mary and her said that they were both pregnant and were allowed to wait execution until she gave birth by law. Her death was never recorded. Some think that her father bribed Jamaica into letting her return home with him.

3.  Along that line, who’s your favorite movie Batman?

The Dark Knight. I think that it showed the real side of the joker.

4. What would be the best thing about being a pirate/ninja/Batman?

I think that it would be changing the world for the better. Pirates rebelled against the unfairness of England’s wealth. Most Ninja try to change peoples mind. Batman protects Gotham City. It is also the power that they have.

5.  Do you think there will ever be peace between pirates and ninjas?  How do you think a truce would ever come about?  Do you think Batman could negotiate the truce?

I hope that peace could happen. It would happen by the death of all pirates or ninjas currently existing. I am not sure, it is a long feud.

6. How would you end said truce and get the feud rolling again and how would you deal with Batman if he tried to interfere?

I think that the truce would end by a ninja seeing a pirate of vice versa. I think that Batman might stay out of mega Pirate vs. Ninja fight. It would make his life easier.

7.  If you tripped and fell into a radioactive vat of cutlasses and gold dubloons and emerged as a pirate-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

That I wouldn’t have scurvy and be super fast with a sword.

8.  If you stumbled a little farther to the left and fell into a radioactive vat of throwing stars and nunchucks and emerged as a ninja-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

I would have a killer kick, literally.

9. If you were a pirate/ninja/Batman and found yourself in love with the enemy (i.e. a ninja/pirate or, say, Catwoman), how would you handle your taboo relationship?

A lot of laughter and trying to change their mind would go a long way.

10. And finally, in the event of the Zombie-apocalypse, how would pirates/ninjas/Batman each survive?

Well, the pirates are on ships or on tiny islands that few people are on. So I think that they could handle that. Ninjas would be able kick off the zombies’ heads and if one came after them. They would be able to jump somewhere really far. Batman would have all his gadgets to help him with. I am sure that he could up with a cure in his Bat cave

Guest Blog #2 – Dia Reeves

Today’s guest blogger, on the subject of pirates, ninjas, and Batman, is YA author Dia Reeves!  Dia’s book, Bleeding Violet, follows the story of a teenage girl teetering on the edge who runs away to find a new life in a new town, only to discover her new town is full of dark secrets and no one is safe.

1. If a pirate, a ninja, and Batman got in a fight, who do you think would win and why?

The ninja, because ninjas are stealthy. By the time the pirate or Batman noticed the ninja, they would be dead already.

2. Who’s your favorite pirate/ninja (in history or fiction)?

My favorite ninjas are the three holy fools from the movie Death Mask of the Ninja. Now, the three holy fools weren’t actually ninjas (they were Shaolin monks) but it still counts. The three holy fools were brothers who hurt so many people with their kung fu that the head monk forbid them to ever leave their house. But that totally didn’t slow them down. One of them managed to fight off a gripload of soldiers WITHOUT ONCE setting foot on the ground. Soooo cool.

3. Along that line, who’s your favorite movie Batman?

Erm…the first one?

4. What would be the best thing about being a pirate/ninja/Batman?

The best thing about being a ninja would be the ability to beat up a gang all by yourself and fly through the air and deflect bullets with your trusty katana.

5. Do you think there will ever be peace between pirates and ninjas? How do you think a truce would ever come about? Do you think Batman could negotiate the truce?

First of all, Batman is too self-involved with his billions of dollars and gorgeous women to bother with either ninjas or pirates. And ninjas and pirates don’t bother with each other. Pirates stay in their little boats and ninjas stay on land.

6. How would you end said truce and get the feud rolling again and how would you deal with Batman if he tried to interfere?

I guess if pirates came ashore onto ninja territory and didn’t show the proper respect, the ninjas would attack and five seconds later, the pirates would be toast. And if Batman interfered he would become jelly. And then the ninjas would have a nice little snack.

7. If you tripped and fell into a radioactive vat of cutlasses and gold dubloons and emerged as a pirate-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

The ability to see big black X’s not only on maps, but on the land itself.

8. If you stumbled a little farther to the left and fell into a radioactive vat of throwing stars and nunchucks and emerged as a ninja-themed supervillain, what would your superpower be?

The ability to kill whole armies with only my pinky.

9. If you were a pirate/ninja/Batman and found yourself in love with the enemy (i.e. a ninja/pirate or, say, Catwoman), how would you handle your taboo relationship?

I would teach whoever it was my ninja skills which would be so awesome, the enemy would give up everything to stay with me and learn more.

10. And finally, in the event of the Zombie-pocalypse, how would pirates/ninjas/Batman each survive?

Pirates would just stay out at sea—whoever heard of zombies who can swim? Batman would barricade himself in his mansion with one or two of his lady friends. And ninjas would stay out of the zombies’ reach by running along the treetops.